I published this page on Substack, you may prefer to read it there:
Context: Asking good questions is as important as atomic war safety, right? It’s the key to this small thing… relationship with another being. Pretty much, there’s “people just telling you stuff on their own,” and then there’s you asking questions. That’s how we connect to, relate to, and exchange with others—and, in the process, understand and grow ourselves. So, in the dry land of questions discourse, I created this resource and organized it so you can quickly access questions during conversations. I often forget this page within a week of updating it—so you’ll likely forget it within an hour. Save or memorize this URL to never have a conversation depleted of fun or meaning again: pawel.world/q
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For easy navigation, I formatted all the questions as bullet points. They’re sorted by importance—so at the top, you’ll find the ones I find most useful or universally applicable.
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There is a colossal difference between the answers to “How is your fitness?” and “What is your relationship with fitness?”. Try it and then ask about almost anything “What is your relationship with food? With the internet? What is the history of your relationship with music? With travel? With leadership? With taking responsibility? Strength? Vulnerability? Fashion? Self-expression? Optimism? Being a public figure? Privacy? Intimacy? via Visa in Friendly Ambitious Nerd
Maybe my favorite question ever—and I use it to ask about anything. But then people are often like: “Nothing!”. But wait… there’s always some delta between your expectations and reality, yo. And then people start sharing the most interesting takes on their trip, book, or someone they met. And learning to notice surprise is such a great muscle to train—a real world-opener, world-discerner.
I use this framing very often when catching up with friends. Something about the rose makes it memorable. Why rose? Petal = best part, thorn = worst part, bud = growth. via Nasimeh friend.